"Secret Sinner:"

Who can understand his own errors?

It had always been a premeditated action. Sworn into deceit and connived into fraudulence, she became a captive to her own erroneous actions. It was not that she did not know that the things she did were wrong, she just always found herself doing the same thing over and over again. Only she knew about them! Yes, she knew the secret things she did at night when she was all alone. She knew the whereabouts of the missing files at work, and of course she knew the reason why her girlfriend's man left the babe in shambles. She also knew the source of her boss' smiles, and about the gifts he gave her.

Tonight, she would go out again for a 'girls-night-out' and they would sit around the chocolate-colored coffee table to discuss shocking tales about conniving bastards at their various social networks. Yet again, she would laugh in disgust and contribute her own opinions, denying any part of such nonsense. But the next day she would become someone else again and manipulate people to fulfill her own wretched desires...

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In Psalm 19:12-14, David wrote a song about self-deceit. He said, "who can understand his own errors? Cleanse me from secret faults and presumptuous sins. Let those sins not have dominion over me so that I can be blameless."

Many times, people know the "right" and "wrong", but nevertheless they still do the exact opposite. Thus far, you've been going around in circles fighting your so-called inner demons. But seriously, are you really fighting them? Or are you lying to yourself?

Fighting something is going all the way until you win. Imagine those heavy-weight champions on the boxing ring, you never see them quit just because blood oozes out of their noses. No, they get back up again and keep boxing. It probably took them years of training to endure the blood and the pain. Meanwhile, when no one is looking at you, you go back to your "secret sins." You go back to those things because you feel that no one is watching, and well, you can always ask for forgiveness anyway.

Yes, God always has his hands open to us, and you are very right. But remember the parable of the rich fool who thought he had his life all stretched out before him like a sheet of gold, and yet that very night his life was required of him and he left this world without any of his riches? I pray that you will live a long and prosperous life-- but you have to know that your life is not in your hands. You have to stop doing whatever it is that makes you watch the shadows to see if anyone is looking at you. Oh God is looking, He's always looking! He sees through the depths of your heart and knows all that you think and do in secret. If you know that you have some "secret faults," make them open to God and let Him in so that He will help you stop them. There is no battle that cannot be won. There are no impossibilities with God. Trust him to live a consistently good life...

Πάντα ῥεῖ καὶ οὐδὲν μένει-- everything flows, nothing stands still (the only constant is change) ~ Plato (Greek)

Whenever you choose to change for the better, your life automatically gains more value. Don't be stagnant in your secret sins, take a hold of Jesus' garment and let Him make you whole again ~ My take.

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A Modern Tale of being Left Behind: The Emphasis

I love art. I've always loved art. I don't know when my love for art began. As I glanced through several featured works on one of my favorite sites, I saw this one. Eyes piercing and sharp, but a little sorrowful. Colorful but dark at the same time. Plain, but intriguing. More than a little bit of sadness.

And then I thought of the last post I wrote. In these times, passion has begun to fade. Those things that once made people jump with glee and run the good race have diminished. So I post this picture here for emphasis, don't be left behind. It is not a one-day 'lightning' experience. It starts with your thoughts, it starts with your emotions...it comes in a subtle way.

PS: feel free to read and comment on the last post, if you haven't already :)

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A Modern Tale of being Left Behind:

Unscrupulous happenings, sharp thunder bolts and lightning! These were not necessarily in the tale of a young woman named Laila. It was really very simple, if you understand what I mean. There were no dead people rising from the grave, or earthquakes killing the people of the land. There were no tales of war in a distant country, or stories of locusts eating the grains of the land. The people were not starving, neither were they desolate. If anything at all was amiss, it was only the crazy unpredictable rainy season of the year, where young children forgot their umbrellas at home and their mothers scolded them for it.

Young Laila, being 27, was being chased for marriage. She was as tall and slender as models in modern fashion spreads, possibly even fairer. She was unique. She called herself a "Christian," a distasteful tag very unlikely for ladies of her age. Everyone knew it, even the mad McFischer brothers down the road. But it was only a tag for Laila. She was not living up to her name anymore and she knew it. At first, she was passionate about God. But after a while she thought it was stupid to be like that every time. She needed a break from it all, at least once in a while. Come on, the body was not a log of wood! So every other Sunday she skipped the service at the Baptist church near the river, and she did some other happy thing, like reading a novel or going shopping ~ little things that made her all giddy with happiness. Once in a while people need to find their happy place, right? So she did...and no one accused her.

After a while, she moved on to higher places of happiness. One Saturday she followed Daniel McFischer to the end of the bend, and there they made love. It felt good, not bad. Almost a month later, she got really mad at Klara for not listening to her rantings, and she told all her secrets to the people at the Baptist church. They were not good stories to reveal. But she said it anyway. Once in a while she still attended church, but she was hardly in the presence of God. She was left behind in her mind, in a place where no one really searches...in her emotions.

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I called this a modern tale of being left behind, because that's exactly what it is. Many of us youngsters are already being left behind. It is not necessarily a one-day 'lightning-in-the-sky' experience. Many are still seeking for a sign to know when the apocalypse will happen. Yes, it could be an unconscious search for a sign...you may not even realize you're doing it.

But when you thought God's love was real before and now you're having second thoughts, then you're seeking for a soul-wrecking sign...something that will jolt you out of bed at night and bring you solemnly to your knees. Unfortunately, it does not look like we will be having any mind-boggling thunder bolts or lightning anytime soon. What it looks like is already happening is the war and troubles of our mind. Some are already being left behind because their minds are no longer present in anything concerning God.

From mere observation, many of us constantly battle with thoughts in our heads. Thoughts of how we want to be like every body else. Thoughts of how "if God existed, why do some things happen the way they do?" Thoughts of MURDER without the action. Thoughts of HATE hidden beneath a smile of pretentious love. Thoughts of SUICIDE hidden beneath a religious sense of joy. Thoughts of faithfulness when you know that deep inside you want to be unfaithful.

I remember now that Jesus said that "an adulterous generation seeks for a sign, but no sign will be given them except the sign of Jonah." That sign is that Jonah was buried in the belly of a fish for three days and then released, a prototype of how Jesus died for your sins and mine and got buried for three days, and on the third day He rose up again. That's the only sign which has already been given, nothing more and nothing less.

My crazy bold statement today is that the process of being left behind has already begun in our minds and emotions. If you're getting tired of the walk, buckle your shoes again and stand up tall...don't let anyone or anything change you...remember those words that God placed inside you a while back...

Let's remember the passion...let's remember our first love today. Don't be LEFT BEHIND...

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